Soul Mating

I've heard this term a lot lately, soul mates. And it really got me thinking about it and what it means to me. So, where better to explain my thoughts and opinion than on a public forum for the world to see, right?

Dictionary.com's definition is this:

a person with whom one has a strong affinity, shared values and tastes, and often a romantic bond

 In the dialogue The Symposium, Aristrophanes explains that humans originally had 4 arms, 4 legs, and a single head made of two faces. Zeus feared their power and split them in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them.

And lastly, Urban Dictionary. Now, usually Urban Dictionary is pretty foul and rancid with some very weird definitions of stuff. This however says what I think most people would agree with:

A person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet -- a connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved anyone prior. Your soulmate understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of peace, calmness and happiness when you are around them. And when you are not around them, you are all that much more aware of the harshness of life, and how bonding with another person in this way is the most significant and satisfying thing you will experience in your lifetime. You are also all that much aware of the beauty in life, because you have been given a great gift and will always be thankful.

I on the other hand, don't buy into it. It all seems a bit too sappy, even for me. The Disney-esque fairy tail is a total fantasy theory. I'm gonna stop here a second. I want to explain, before I continue on, that this entry might come across jaded or bitter. That is NOT my intention at all. I'm not bitter about love, or jaded by anyone. I've felt love, and experienced it. So again, I'm not trying or aiming at being jaded or bitter in any of this. It's just my thought process on the matter.

I believe that "soul mates" can happen with almost anyone. What I believe is really happening is the excitement of dating someone you genuinely find interest in on a mental and physical level. As you get to know them, you start growing butterflies in your stomach. Gross, right? The excitement, and anxiousness of hearing from them, seeing them, talking to them, completely engrosses you're whole being. AND, if you're lucky, they are feeling the same way. THAT is what I think most people perceive as meeting your soul mate. It's called the honeymoon stage of dating, I think. The real fun begins when that's over and your head comes back out of the clouds. The effort and work two people put into a relationship is what's important.
Soul Mates don't just click and never have a problem.  That would be unbelievable.

Dang it. I just argued myself out of a belief that I had. It's almost like the facts are stronger in the favor of soul mates existing than not.

When I write, I'm thinking about 4 sentences ahead of what I'm actually typing. Which can be very frustrating because my fingers can only record the brain activity so quickly. What I had done, without actually writing it, was inadvertently change the belief I had in my head.  There are strong examples in my life of specific couples who met, and just immediately clicked. Sure there were a very small handful of incidences where they had a small argument or tiff, but nothing that understanding and communication couldn't fix. Actually, screw that. I still don't buy this 'soul mate' gimmick.

 Love is a feeling that is unique to each individual. You can love lots of things, (I love lamp). But the real true love that happens is on the emotional level. The emotional level is, in my opinion, one of the strongest levels one can feel on, because, uh, it's your feelings?? Emotions are an open invitation to vulnerability. Being physical (hugs, kisses, sex, ect), or being understanding of the mentality and opinions/habits that the other has, is great. Those are very important 'levels' to be in love at. But the true level is emotional.

I don't believe that there is just ONE person out there that when you meet you just totally lose your oxygen from. I can't believe that. That just sounds ridiculous. I mean, if that had happened to me, than what had I experienced before prior to that? A really strong like towards someone? That sounds retarded. I know what love is, I've shown it, and had it shown to me in the past. It's incredible. But a soul mate? Someone who just gets you and loves you right away, regardless of anything else? Someone you just immediately click with and just lock eyes and just fall flat on your face stupid head over butt over? Come'on. Really? I mean... REALLY? Psh... that just sounds like some crazy gimmicky cheesy storyline that comes apparently in almost every classic 'Chick Flick', or 'Romance' story. The odds are incredibly and severely low on that actually happening.

I think what's really happening is just a unique and awesome level of understanding. Not to mention that both parties are most likely already fully aware of themselves (faults and all) and are fully aware of exactly what they are looking for. When those two factors are operating at full strength, then sure, boom! Love happens and people live happily ever somewhere.

Again, this might have come across bitter, it's not. I'm just skeptic of that actually existing. If I'm wrong, I'll admit it. I'm just sayin'. That's all.

Vegas Teaches...

I had one of the greatest trips to Vegas in a very long time. I went with two of my oldest friends (20 years) and just had a really relaxing time. There were a few things I noticed though while watching people, having my drinks, and being awake at 5/6 am (cause THAT'S how you do Vegas).

For starters, I realized that it doesn't matter your body type, your style, or look; anybody can get a "hot" person. I've always 'known' this to be a fact, and in theory have always had that concept that confidence is what attracts others. But when it comes down to pool time in Vegas, there are some seriously funky looking people, and some seriously gorgeous looking people. Sure we can attribute alcohol to their poor eye sight, but to be completely honest, their body language didn't show intoxication. Just an interesting sight to behold when a dude with a massive beer gut, bleached white skin and an incredible farmers tan, is able to have some "barbie" model on his arm.

Secondly, the walk of shame starts at about 5 am, and it's very difficult NOT to make fun and say something to a total stranger who is too ashamed to look at anyone.

Third, I could wear a suit everyday. I love wearing a suit. I'm not one to be cocky, or egotistical... well... not typically... usually... often? I make valid attempts to be humble, on occasion, er... a few times a... well; I try. But I look good in a suit. And I really love feeling good. So if there's something wrong with me feeling good, you can shove it, because I like it. I do what I want!

I wanted to have a forth, or at least more the list. But I don't really have much else to say. I think it's great that Vegas says: "What happens here, stays here." But you know that crap is online. People are stupid. Total sheep. I love watching their idiocy. Granted, I tend to become part of that idiocy, and that's still just as fun. I think I like having more of a group when I go to the pool, because it makes it more of a party and easier to be social with strangers. I really wanted to lindy bomb the pool. And that's not a bad thing people. That just means I wanted to have some dancer friends with me to dance in the lazy river and show off the skills we got to the random dance music.
I also really like having classy stuff. I mean, going to Vegas on the cheap is great. But if you can do some high class suite, or high roller, baller status, room? Do it! Granted, you aren't there much, or at least shouldn't be. But when you are, it feels nice. The trip as a whole was incredible. The car we rented only had 240 miles on it, was a Black Dodge Avenger, and looked very stylish. The hotel accommodations were great. I mean, I spent hardly anything, and felt like I had spent a crap-ton. Really swanky stuff. So needless to say, a tie was required for whenever I went out. And I do love wearing a tie.

I also caught up with an old friend while I was there. I'd say more than a friend, but I've never really been one to divulge the intricacies of my relationships... wait... do I?? No.... no, I don't think I do, not on here anyways. But regardless, it was friggin' fantastic to catch up and return those old memories to the forefront. Been awhile since I had been able to just sit and talk with a good friend who I hadn't seen in so many years and yet still read me and knew me like it was yesterday. Great end to a awesome day.

I really feel I'm missing something here. Hmmm... Nope. I think I'm good. I would like to branch out of my little "Vegas" bubble I think. The only people I've ever gone to Vegas with are people that I had grown up with, friends I had known for well over 5, if not 7 years. Anyone else, I never bothered to go. I guess there's just a deeper sense of friendship I hold on to that restrains me from being 100% completely open to everyone else. Not that they aren't all great and amazing friends, but it's something I'm definitely realizing after this trip. Vacations, trips and excursions with people you think you know super well, can quickly change in setting that is completely different from the norm. I could just be being super cautious as I don't want to lose those people I've gained as close friends. Not that I would push them away, nor would I judge them by any means. But with my wiring, if I'm not enjoying their company, and I realize that I'm more annoyed with them than I am with having fun, then I'm going to make some changes; and quickly at that.

I might be rambling. It's 10pm, I've slept all of 8 hours in 3 days? It's quite possible that I'm completely delirious and .... I digress, I'm exhausted. I need to write more, and more so when I'm in a more comprehensive state of mind.

Shut up, this all made sense in my head.